Who?

1. Members of a 9Marks-friendly local church - a church that prioritizes things like expositional preaching, biblical church leadership, meaningful membership, church discipline, and biblical worship.
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2. Those who are convictionally reformed in their soteriology, baptist, and complementarian.

3. Those who are at least 23 years old. We’re not trying to exclude younger adults! We just want to steward this space toward a particular stage of adult life.
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4. Those who desire to be married. We know that not every single person desires marriage, but this space is for those who are seriously pursuing marriage.

FAQS

What?

It’s actually pretty simple. We wanted to create a way for singles in 9Marks churches to get to know one another, so we built a short form for someone to fill out (see our post about who this is for). You’ll answer a few questions about your church membership, share a brief testimony, list any influential books or authors, and describe the direction you hope your life will take.

Once you submit the form and an entrance fee, our team will review your information. When you’re approved, your form will go live, and you’ll be able to view information and photos from others who have completed the process. From there, you’re free to reach out to one another — or loop in your elders if that’s your preference.

Why?

When it comes to finding a spouse, theological and ecclesiological convictions truly matter.In our experience, most online dating platforms fall short in providing the kind of information that’s actually important—things like church membership, theological alignment, and accountability within a local church. They’re often disconnected from any local church awareness or oversight.

As we spoke with other singles from 9Marks-friendly churches who shared these concerns, it became clear: there’s a need for a better way to connect reformed, complementarian, ecclesiologically like-minded singles who are seeking marriage. That’s why we set out to create a space where like-minded believers can find one another with greater confidence and transparency.

Frequently Asked Questions

What makes this dating interface different from other dating apps?

Don’t Waste Your Date is designed to help like-minded Christians pursue marriage with intentionality, rooted in the life of healthy local churches. We aim to serve believers who value meaningful membership, sound doctrine, and a shared commitment to Reformed theology.

What is the goal of dating on Don’t Waste Your Date?

The goal is to pursue Christ-honoring relationships with a clear view toward marriage. This isn’t about casual dating, but about thoughtfully getting to know other like-minded believers.

Do I need to be a member of a local church to join?

Yes. We believe committed membership in a local church is an important part of following Christ, so it’s a requirement for joining the platform.

Do you have to live in the United States to join?

No. While most of our members are based in the United States, we also have members from several countries around the world.

Is there an upper age limit?

No! While most of the members of this platform are in their 20s, 30s, and 40s, we are happy for older singles to join and hope that the Lord may use this to provide a Godly spouse.

What is the administrative fee?

There is a one-time administrative fee of $40. There are no ongoing or monthly fees.

Is this connected to 9Marks?

No, we are not formally affiliated with the ministry of 9Marks. However, we deeply respect the resources they have produced and have been significantly influenced by their work.

Will my pastor or church leaders be involved?

Yes! We periodically reach out to pastors to let them know who from their church is using the platform, helping foster transparency and accountability. Beyond that, we strongly encourage you to involve your pastor or church leaders as you get to know someone.

What kind of information is included in profiles?

Profiles go beyond basic details and include your testimony, church membership, doctrinal beliefs, ministry involvement, and even influential books or authors that have shaped you.

How do you ensure users are genuine believers?

While we can’t guarantee the character of every individual, we’ve built the platform to encourage honesty and accountability—through church membership, thoughtful profile questions, and initial connections through pastors. Even so, we encourage you to move forward with wisdom and involve trusted members of your church community early on.

What happens if someone behaves inappropriately?

You can report any concerns to our team. Repeated or serious issues may result in removal from the platform, and in some cases, church leaders may be informed.

What doctrinal beliefs are required?

Users should affirm core evangelical doctrines, along with the specific convictions of this platform—such as Reformed theology, believer’s baptism, and complementarianism—and be a member of a church aligned with 9Marks ecclesiology.

Is there a policy on exclusivity?

We encourage clear, honest communication and recommend focusing on one relationship at a time once there is mutual interest.

Can I edit my profile?

At this time, profiles can’t be edited directly. If you’d like to make any updates, feel free to reach out to our team—we’re glad to help.

Can I delete my account anytime?

Yes—just reach out to us at any time, and we’ll be happy to remove your profile.

Who?

What?

Why?

How?

Ready to Connect?

Frequently Asked Questions